Singleness...A Blessing or a Curse?

I have always been a planner.  As a child, I had my life and major milestones all mapped out.  It went something like this: Finish high school (age 17); graduate from college (age 21); finish grad school/ start career (age 23); get married (age 25); and so on.  As I was matriculating through school, I was easily checking off my educational goals.  However, my dating life was a completely different story.  I dated, but had not yet met the man God has for me.  As I entered my mid-twenties, I began to put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure I was married by a certain age.  Sadly, I was under the impression that having a husband and kids would provide a sense of wholeness in my life.

          I remember sitting in a singles conference and rolling my eyes after the minister said that singles were fortunate because we have the opportunity to fall asleep with our bibles and study materials in the bed.  I remember thinking “that bible can’t keep anyone warm at night!”  Yet, over the past year, God has shown me that true fulfillment is found only in having a strong and intimate relationship with Him.  Psalm 42:1 (NIV) states, “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for my God.”  It is my belief that some of the emptiness people may feel stems from our soul needing a deeper connection with God.  As singles, we may try to fill that hollowness with a mate, more friendships, or hobbies.  However, these things will never quench that deep thirst within us.  The only way to achieve wholeness and true happiness is through God.  Colossians 2:10 (NIV), says, “and in Christ you have been brought to fullness…”  

The season of singleness is an excellent time to build a strong relationship with our Heavenly Father.  Singles have more time to spend exploring and developing their gifts.  Singles also have the opportunity to cultivate a strong sense of their identity in Christ.  All these factors can lead to us being more content and fulfilled with our lives.  If we singles use this time in our lives to become closer to God, then we will experience a sense of completeness with or without the presence of a mate.